another weekend draws near. another week closer to my departure. all good things come to and end is my new mantra. and in may/june, it will be a new beginning, i hope.

by the way, just so you know, any smses that contain the sentence "so when exactly are you leaving?" will not be replied for various reasons (such as, i really dont know, and im a shitty escapist that hates talking about it)

things are falling in to place a little. for the first time in my life, i think i know what i want. after three years of faculty hopping, i think i've figured out what i'm going to be doing, and for the first time in my life, i think i will persist, family obligations or not. and in part, i think my family are at that point where they're grateful if i'll just settle down for once and not shock them at family dinners with my out-there ambitions ("i think i'm going to design clothes" or "i think i'm going to be a chef", and the like).

this week has been lots of catching up and making up for lost time with old, old friends. wednesday at soundbar/liquid room was an all out drunk-fest (we made up a new game called ' 'I miss ____ in Melbourne'), followed by a very long cab ride to the end of the world. lunch at Toast on thursday with jun and ling was the nicest thing i've done in ages, second only to dinner at Spizza at HV with baoyi.

so here i am at home on a friday night, after coffee and window shopping with cousin W, getting my shit together so i can meet ling and mei at HV later tonight. in many ways, i do miss the days when we were 15, any everything was so very simple.


vertical horizon - goodbye again

for some odd fuck reason, i woke up at about 3:30 to get a drink of water and have not been able to fall back asleep since then. have been up, filing up on cigarettes and working on my mini pet project. am most excited about it :)

i think i need to relax on the spending. must constantly remind self that am not working anymore, thus cannot make fake transportation claims. having woken up really late after my sunday afternoon nap with latte, i was left with little choice but to take a cab down to club st to meet up with kathy for drinks at bar savanh. post b.s, we decided to head down to soundbar for more drinks and yaks, and promised (ok, this is like totally one-sided) to meet up on wednesday at zouk before she leaves for the UK. (she suggusted a tamer yakun kaya toast breakfast)

last night with huney and winkums was absolute fun! save for the super slow service at the new open-concept coffee club (understandable though, considering the crowd), and the byatch that stole our parking space, it was a perfect chill out saturday night. two mudpies, a latte (finally! someone in singapore knows how to make a good one), and a lychee/rambutan god-knows-what later, we had covered most aspects of the usual catch-up convo. from our ala days of our lives secondary school scenarios, to lost loves, to manipulative bastards, to karma (we concluded that #1, relationship karma begins at your first gf/bf, #2, bad karma happens when you intentionally hurt someone, and #3, if the person/victim has is lost in the woods, ie has no idea whats happening behind their backs, then it cancels out karma rule #2).

so, after a weekend of ups and downs, i have learnt a couple things.
1. that whole karma jazz (read paragraph above)
2. finding a parking spot in town on a saturday night is a national past time
3. not only am i a secret sadist, i am also extremely masochistic (and in our case, mutually masochistic. lol.)
4. i am so over the sweetie-pie-i'll-do-your-every-biding passive prototype
5. emotional repercussions of the choices we make are solely ours to bear
6. gallantry is way up there on the desired virtue list


no matter how scathed we walk away from all of this. i want you to remember one thing:
i chose happiness. and i choose you.



death cab - a movie script ending